Success!!!!!!
I followed all the advise here and soldered the deans right up! Flux and the right solder made all the difference.
Even switched to my el-chepo iron (25watt pen type) instead of my 40/100watt gun.
http://www.rctech.net/forum/members/...urecomment3329

The gun seems to only be heating if pressure is applied to the tip which i noticed after I tinned the first wire. Any ideas what could cause this?